My theories regarding this convention

1. The real reason so many GOP politicians aren't attending is because they don't want to be bored to tears.

2. All this info about Sarah Palin is being leaked by lackeys of Tim Pawlenty and Yosemite Mitt, in revenge for not getting the nomination.

3. Dubya is giving his speech via satellite because he's afraid to be in the same convention center as his parents. He knows Poppy Bush is seriously mad at him.

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